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Am I a good coach? * I listen then ask questions * My questioning techniques have the intent of understanding and supporting, rather than...

 

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(The Daily Avocado)The Daily Avocado is an interactive website magazine containing articles that I've written for various publications as we...

 

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Sisi Positif PHKoleh Dion Juanda Gibran Pemutusan Hubungan Kerja (PHK) saat ini sepertinya menjadi sesuatu yang menakutkan bagi sebagian o...

 

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Lost in Bhutan (For the rest of the article read my blog: 'Lost in Bhutan' on http://desianwar.blogspot.com/)From time to time I get the ur...

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An Examined Life

I am reading the speech made by Socrates when he was tried by the Athenians with charges of ‘corrupting the youths’ and for which he was condemned to death by drinking the poison hemlock and I find it amazing how words spoken over two thousand millennia ago could still ring true today.  Here was a man put to death because he was a ‘gadfly’ to the state, an affront to the ‘polite’ society who were suspicious of teachings considered contrary to the norm and who was seen as a threat to mores and values of the day.


And what were those values?  Socrates was a philosopher whose life was dedicated to asking question and challenging assumptions people took for granted.  He was accused of godlessness and yet he was a great believer in the spirits and divine beings.  He dedicated his life to the pursuit of knowledge and the improvement of the self and for this the young followed him as a man of wisdom and a teacher who taught them about the need to pursue a life of virtue.


‘Men of Athens, I honour and love you; but I shall obey God rather than you, and while I have life and strength I shall never cease from the practice and teaching of philosophy, exhorting anyone whom I meet after my manner, and convincing him, saying: O my friend, why do you who are a citizen of the great and mighty and wise city of Athens , care so much about laying up the greatest amount of money and honour and reputation, and so little about wisdom and truth and the greatest improvement of the soul, which you never regard or heed at all? Are you not ashamed of this? And if the person with whom I am arguing says: Yes, but I do care; I do not depart or let him go at once; I interrogate and examine and cross-examine him, and if I think that he has no virtue, but only says that he has, I reproach him with undervaluing the greater, and overvaluing the less.’

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Photo by Desi Anwar

The Challenge of Multitasking

I could barely remember the days when life was not all about multitasking.  When one did things one at a time and if you wanted to do a lot of things, then it was a matter of doing things faster, more efficiently or simply finding the time in which to do them.  The form of multitasking in the good old days that I could think of, that is when time seemed to move a lot slower and there were certainly a lot less gadgets in my hand, on my lap and in my handbag, was when I read a book while eating my packet of crisps and sipping my cup of tea, or watching the television while vacuuming the carpet at the same time.

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Photo by Desi Anwar

The Meaning of Happiness

Happiness, they say, is a state of mind.   It is not what you have and it is not what you do.  It is how you feel as you are going through the motion of living.  But then, it is not like emotions either, that change when the sun shines or the rain pours, or even for absolutely no reason at all.  Rather it is a constant (like a background noise that ceases to have no sound because one ceases to listen to it) whose presence is noticeable only during its absence.  Indeed, it is often in moments of unhappiness do we realize how happy our lives have been!  In times of loss do we appreciate how much we actually own.


So, how do we achieve a happy state of mind then?  It is not, as we have said, in possessing.  But we do feel elevated in the anticipation of possessing something we’ve always wanted, do we not?  However, this pleasant sense of anticipation normally disappears very soon after we finally possess what we wanted.  So we move on to the next set of desirable object, not to delight in that object itself, but to fulfil that craving, to revel in the pleasure of the chase and the anticipation.  To get intoxicated in the anguish of being denied.

This anguish (the pain of the lover waiting for the beloved) however, must not be confused with happiness.  Though often it does make one feel that much more alive and gives one a sense of purpose.  That one’s life has a meaning, whether it is in accumulation of all sorts of material things, experiencing different situations and forming a variety of relationships.

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A Romantic Journey

To Tweet or Not To Tweet

Every morning as soon as I get up and on the way to the office I update my status on my mobile Twitter with words on the lines of ‘good morning people’ or ‘on my way to the office, traffic not so bad this morning’. Throughout the day as I go through my daily activities I duly tweet what I do, what I eat, my opinions on current issues, my responses to what other Twitterers post and from time to time, my ideas and from time to time, some words or wisdom that cross my mind.

The last thing I do before retiring for the night is to check my Twitter Timeline and post a final tweet for the day, usually not forgetting to wish people goodnight.

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Parodzong

Lesson On Not Being Selfish

I remembered when I was sick in bed one day and had to miss school. There was a virus going round that time and for some reason or another I caught it. Being unwell and having to skip classes was not something that often happened to me, as I was generally a pretty healthy child and a good schoolgirl who actually enjoyed school and learning new things!


However, what made this insignificant incident stick in my mind was not the fact that I got sick but what my father said to me as I lay stretched on my back feeling poorly and a little sorry for myself. In his kind voice, though somewhat more pragmatic than sympathetic, he said something along this line: ‘try not to be sick because when you’re sick you’re very selfish. People who get themselves sick means they can’t look after themselves and it’s unfair and a bother to other people who have to make time and effort to look after them.’

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Life Tips

Bad English Don't major in English. If you love studying English, there's nothing wrong with that. Just be aware that English majors generally don't earn very much. Six of the top ten list of majors with the highest salaries are engineering majors, with chemical engineering topping the list.
Get Nutty Now Nuts are good for you. If you’re counting calories, research shows that nuts aren't linked to weight gain.
What to do in an Earthquake If you're indoors: Stay indoors when tremors start. Get under a sturdy table, desk or bed, or stand in a doorway or an inside corner next to an interior wall: Keep away from windows, mirrors, glass, bookcases, light fittings, tall cabinets and fireplaces. If you're outdoors: Get into an open area; avoid buildings, walls, power lines and trees: If you're in a car, stop - but stay inside until the tremors stop. Avoid bridges and power lines.



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